Sunday Confession: Little

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Something little just changed my entire world. And by “just”, I mean, literally less than 24 hours ago.

 

I had this gut feeling it was a girl. Every time I said the girls name out loud that I had chosen, I got a small chill. My soul knew my someday daughter was on her way home. Finally.

The 5 year old knew as well. He informed me one day that the baby in my belly had a vagina and would be named “Girl He-Man.”

Let’s just say he was half right.

I won’t go into all of the details of the labor part. Only to say it was long and hard. The boys were all phenomenal during the laboring at home. They helped out so much and were all so eager to see the baby be born. I felt badly that they missed that part when I transferred. Start to finish my water had been broken  16 hours and I spent nearly 3 solid hours dealing with HARD contractions approximately 1-2 minutes apart, sometimes even closer than that. Between not sleeping in 2 days and almost no break between contractions for that much time I was exhausted. And still had a long time to go as far as dilation. And signs of a possible infection from prolonged rupture of membranes……

So, off to the hospital we went.

I’m not thrilled it worked out that way. But I know it was the best choice to be made for the well being of myself and my baby.

I still did do most of my laboring at home. Daddy was a phenomenal support. Above and beyond what I even expected of him. He was my rock. I spent much of early labor walking and singing. I kicked labor off with a walk around the block with all 6 of my Littles in the sunshine, feeling blessed and ready. Did my hypnobirthing meditation in bed with the fat chihuahua curled up by my side. Vocalized my contractions in the bathtub while the toddler lay in his crib in the next room and mimicked me.

At 9:49 I started to push.

At 9:51 my baby was born.

I’m not kidding.

The deal was, Daddy was going to be the one to announce the sex of the baby to me. But I got first glimpse from my vantage point. The nurse lifted the umbilical cord and I saw the most perfect tiny vulva ever. 🙂 Then Daddy announced it. “It’s a girl.”

And I bawled…..like a ….well, yeah. Like a baby. Bawled through a huge smile. Reached my finger out and she grabbed right a hold of it. Held on tightly to her mama for a moment til they swooped her away to check out her vitals and all that jazz. She had to go to the NICU for an elevated temp from the infection from prolonged rupture of membranes but they let me hold her a moment and I bawled again and called her “Princess” and she was so little and perfect.

And here I am. Officially the mother to a daughter. I cant believe how blessed I am. How honored. How humbled. How overwhelmed with love.Her six big brothers will be here later today to meet her for the first time. This is my life now. A wonderful new dimension to the controlled chaos.

It’s funny how something so very little can flip your entire world upside down.

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MoreThanCheeseandBeer

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3 responses »

  1. Awww that was a beautiful post. The littlest people make us so happy. At least until the terrible twos and then it just gets worse from there with highlights like premenstrual preteen years. I have 3 girls. They don’t have to grow up so fast for me. I fear the pre-teen stage. Then they are all going to want cars and sweet 16 parties… I couldn’t afford this if I sold my liver on the black market.

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