They tell me I can’t possibly tread this water.
Cant possibly skim even the surface of the purpose
of this mystery.
But if history
tends to run on a cycle of repeat,
If desire is the sum of passion and heat,
Then I can tell them my viens drip lava.
Glowing red like flames,
steaming up like my mornings cup of java.
I carry determination like a sturdy weight on my back.
My eyes focused forward, pay no mind to the slack
To the pulling and straining and feet-dragging behind me
To the voices that haunt and try to remind me.
Theres a glow up ahead,
a shining, a shimmer,
A promise in the distance where the fears all grow dimmer.
They can’t keep my feet from this path,
They cant turn me away, theres just no turning back.
They shout louder and louder and shake fists at the sky,
Demanding some reasons, some hows and some whys.
And maybe they see in a glimpse, in a moment,
That this peace from within,
This place to begin
Is so much bigger, wiser, stronger,
That it cant be ignored any longer.
But I havent time to answer these questions
Though posed from the left and the right
I havent time to pause and ponder
Nor time in me left to fight.
Im just moving onward, moving upward,
Past the shadows in the corners,
Eyes aimed toward that shining distance
beyond the grievers and mourners.
They tell me to give up, to give in,
They say love cannot triumph over fear.
They tell me I cant possibly tread this water,
But I’ve been doing it for 33 years.